“I'm BORED” // Do Modern-day Children Really Know The Meaning?

“I'm bored”, a phrase regularly said in my house of three children and many around the world, but do modern-day children truly know what being bored feels like? Or even what it is.

For most of us (adults), being bored was more of a rite of passage. There wasn’t constant entertainment when we got home from school, and no summer camps in sight. These days, most restaurant tables are filled with children on a phone who can’t possibly wait the 15 minutes needed to cook their food (no judgement, we’ve all been there), iPads in buggies, and generally some sort of tech device in sticky hands.

Boredom used to mean having nothing to do, but given the modern-day child has access to just about everything at the click of a button, it’s easy for their boredom to be solved quickly. A few taps, and they're watching their favourite video or playing their favourite game. They're unlikely to be sitting in uncomfortable boredom. Maybe the question really is "Are we as parents and caregivers allowing our children to feel bored?".

A child being bored is an underrated concept and very valuable as a life lesson. It’s not a problem to be solved but an experience to be had. It sparks creativity because when there is no structure, like an activity or a screen to fill the time, kids are forced to dig into their imagination. This encourages independence and builds problem-solving skills. As many of us who live in this region and other countries know all too well, it is an extremely fast-paced world. Learning to slow down and tap into your emotions and boredom is an important skill to continue to develop. Rather than being immediately distracted, it teaches patience, mindfulness, and emotional regulation, skills that will benefit them as they enter adulthood.

Downtime - something that we are all bad at - is crucial for kids' brains, memory, focus, and overall mood. Constant stimulation can be extremely exhausting, and ensuring you have that downtime means that your brain has a little moment to switch off.

Rather than getting frustrated with the constant 'I'm bored' and the battles with screen time, how can we encourage our children to be bored healthily and constructively? There are a few ways to do this, which empower your children to tap into their imagination and learn to regulate their own emotions.

// Screen Time

Limiting screen time is important. We've all been there - we know that screentime has a place in every home, even if it just allows you to be able to drink that nice hot cup of tea or eat your breakfast in peace. But having your child in front of the screen all day long or after school hours can be detrimental to their health. You don't need to cut it out completely, but what we would suggest is having some set go-to spare time where you are entirely tech-free or setting a timer on the iPad so that after an hour, they get a reminder that they need to be switching off.

// Over-scheduling can be your biggest nemesis

The weekdays are filled with busy activities - getting up, getting the kids dressed, and getting them into school. ECA's (Extra Curricular Activities), after-school clubs, lessons, sports activities, and even playdates can mean we are busy throughout the week. That's why it's important that at the weekend, rather than trying to fill these days with as many activities as possible, you leave little chunks of unstructured time in their day to let them figure out how to entertain themselves and have nothing planned. This allows for creativity to flourish, even if momentarily.

// Hold back being the entertainment officer

It can be very easy to jump into action when you hear a child say they're bored. But give them that space to understand what boredom is and reassure them that it's okay, and that you are sure they can come up with something to do. You can give them a few pointers, bring out some toys or puzzles from the cupboard, but what we don't want to do is be at their beck and call for every 'I'm bored' moment.

// Open-ended play

There's nothing worse than opening a puzzle only for it to be completed within 5 seconds and to be followed up with "ok, it's done, now what?". An alternative to this could be to stock up your home with items that could spark some imagination, like a craft box, LEGO, fancy dress, or even just some blankets and clips that will allow them to make dens. Something less structured will allow for more imaginative play.

// Practice what you preach

We've all been there: ask a child to put down their iPad or turn off the TV, only to sit down and pick up your phone. It's extremely important that we lead by example and show that everybody needs a little bit of ‘boredom’ in their downtime.

Something else to remember when it comes to kids being bored is that often this can manifest in other ways. In my household, it comes as ‘I’m hungry’ (having just eaten), which translates as ‘I’m bored’ or can mean they are uncomfortable or overstimulated. Constant stimulation is exhausting, and just like adults, kids need their downtime to reset.