Why We Need to Stop Saying "Hope You Are Well"

I would like to think my personal brand comes across as bubbly and positive, and there aren’t many things that frustrate me in life (well, Crocs do feature pretty highly), but there is one thing in business that does make me squint when I read it, and that is an email that starts with "I hope you are well" or "I trust you are well."

Don’t get me wrong; I am not averse to being nice in emails. So, why does this bother me so much?

In my opinion, it's a cliché and an overused phrase. Because it's so frequently used, it can feel like a default opening rather than a meaningful sentiment.

When I shared my initial thoughts on this on Instagram, the number of comments I received saying, "But I actually mean it!" made me think. If you actually mean it, why don’t you ask me how I am rather than assume?

Your personal brand is an amalgamation of your online and offline persona, and I believe how you make people feel and remember you is crucial. This lack of personalisation can make your personal brand come across as generic. Without specific details or a personal touch, it may seem like the sender hasn't put much thought into the message.

In business, an email is often the first point of contact. According to Vanessa Van Edwards, author of Cues, there has to be a good balance of warmth and competence to convey charisma. A generic opening like "I hope you are well" fails to achieve this balance and instead comes across as insincere and lazy.

So, how can you make your emails more genuine and engaging?

// Personalise Your Opening

Consider starting with something more personalised or directly relevant to the recipient.

Here are a few suggestions:

1. Reference Recent Events:

o Mention a recent event or update in their life or work. Social media platforms like LinkedIn or Instagram can be great sources for this information. For instance, "I saw on LinkedIn that your team recently won the industry award. Congratulations!"

2. Ask Specific Questions:

o Asking a specific question about something you know they are involved in shows genuine interest. For example, "How did your presentation at the conference go last week?"

3. Express Genuine Appreciation:

o Expressing gratitude for something they have done can make your message stand out. Try, "Thank you for sharing your insights in the last meeting. They were incredibly valuable."

Breaking away from clichés and generic phrases requires a bit more effort, but the payoff is worth it. Authenticity is key, especially in the age of AI, as we want to see more personality.

One of my clients, Dr. Corrie Block, author of LOVE @ Work, signs all his emails ‘Love Corrie.’ His book dives into the overlooked power of love in professional lives and shows how empowering organisational culture and leadership with love revolutionises employee engagement, performance, and overall business success.

While "I hope you are well" might seem like a harmless opening (and you may very well mean it), it can detract from the effectiveness of your communication. By putting in the effort to personalise your emails, you can create a more positive impression, build stronger relationships, and enhance your personal brand.

So, in reply to "I hope this email finds you well," the answer is, no, I ‘hope’ it never finds me 😊.

// Kelly Lundberg, Personal Brand Expert