When we enter a promising relationship and dream of marriage, we often view things through rose-tinted glasses. We often overlook the ever-important questions we should have asked, only to realise later that we could have gotten to know each other a little better and taken the time to explore these topics of conversation before tying the knot.
Here are four questions that we suggest should always be asked before walking down the aisle:
1. Do you want children?
It is often assumed that when a man enters a relationship, he will want kids with us. But does he genuinely want the same as you? Is he on the same page as you and aligned with our timeline for starting a family, or does he have different priorities, such as going traveling? These all-important questions should be asked before making a lifelong commitment to marriage.
2. How are we managing our finances?
We, as women, find it essential to have a sense of personal financial control and security. Therefore, we also need to feel assured that we are entering into a partnership with someone financially responsible and stable. It is imperative to have discussions with your partner before getting married to align how you will manage your finances post-marriage. Will there be a joint bank account? How will the household bills be divided? Being transparent and clear regarding financial responsibilities is essential in any relationship so that there are no misunderstandings down the road.
3. How does he feel about helping around the house?
You will gain some insight into your partner's attitude towards gender roles when you start having the conversation about what you expect of him around the house or ask him for help. Be clear with your expectations and communicate directly. Because if you don’t address this and he spends his evenings on the couch while you handle dinner and the washing up alone, you will not be happy!
4. What does he think of your family and friends?
It is just as important to consider and understand your partner's opinions on your friends and family as you will obviously be spending time with both people. If your partner chooses to dislike them all it will create a great deal of discomfort. Therefore, beforehand clarify who he dislikes and his reasons. Will he stop you from seeing certain friends or family members? Is he comfortable with them visiting or staying over? Understanding any peculiar rules or odd preferences is essential in any long-term relationship.
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